Tuesday, August 26, 2014

True Blood "Thank You." AKA: Thanks for a crappy ending!

Okay, seriously True Blood fans. Am I the only one that thought the ending was a bunch of crap?!

Here's a quick summary.

Eric kills Mr Gus in a fiery tunnel. Eric and Pam turn into really bad infomercial stars and push their New Blood. You took Eric last week as an overly hot sex god on his throne, to a cheezy 1970's polyester wearing game show host. Even his hair was bad. Really.

Bill feels that he never was able to see his human daughter get married, so he basically guilts Hoyt and Jessica into getting hitched. Tonight. Before he dies.

Can anyone say Selfish Asshole? Yes, let Bill have what he wants, but won't even dare give Jessica, Sookie, and nearly everyone else in Bon Temps  what they want -- which is Bill alive (or as alive as a vampire can be) and with them all. Drink from Newme/Sarah. Hell, she gave herself so many names the last couple of episodes you could have pretended it was someone else.

So he does the Daddy Vampire thing, gets Jessica hitched to a human. Hmm, okay for her to get married and live with a human, but not for Bill do to the same with Sookie? She can only be happily married if she has a human husband? Selfish Vampire Bill....selfish.

THEN, as if that's not enough, he has to have Sookie help him die. UGH. Leaves her behind in his Vampire Goo.

You get a fast forward of a Thanksgiving dinner, outside Sookie's house with all the human-vamp pairings in bliss. Hoyt and Jessica, Arlene and Kevin, Lafayette and James, then the human-humans of Sam - Nicole and children, Andy-Holly and their step-sibling-sex partners Adilyn and Wade, Jason and Hoyt's ex-girfriend Bridget and their brood of offspring, and Sookie, very preggers and some mystery husband. You never see his face. He's kinda tall, has some facial hair, and you don't know who he is. IT DOESN'T MATTER! It's not Vampire Bill! It's not Eric. It's not Alcide. Most importantly, IT'S NOT SAM! Did you even READ the books??? Noooooo....Obviously not.
it's just some random bloke. 

I feel cheated. True Blood, I watched till the end, and I have to say, it was a painful true death.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

True Blood - S7/Ep9: To Love is to Die. AKA: Jessica (and Ginger's) Happy Ending

Well folks. The end is near, at least for Bill Compton. He has chosen the True Death. His fate. Jessica and Sookie have not accepted that and are super pissed at him. Sookie bitch slaps him, and Jessica asks Bill to release her. He does. Jessica is comforted by Pam (of all people) who tells her, “If your crying ruins my jacket, you’re payin’ for it sweetheart.” Of course, Sookie turns to Eric. 

Paying a visit to Sam, Jessica and Sookie find it empty. Sam is gone, cleared out.  He did leave her a letter saying that while he’s not sure if Nicole is right or wrong about the town, what he does know is that loves her, and isn’t missing out at having his child. He invites her to visit them in Chicago. Two pair then go to Bellefleurs, and not only Arlene, Lafayette and his boy toy, James. Faye asks Sookie if she’s all right, and she announces that Sam is gone.  She gives Andy the letter from Sam, which only says “I resign.” 

James apologizes to Jessica, and she confesses that she really doesn’t know much about him. She apologizes to him for not caring enough to ask about those things, and wants to know if he’s happy. He says he is, and she leaves. 

Bridget is arguing with Hoyt about the kid issue. She’s not happy, and asks about the googlie-eyed, red-headed vampire. He says he didn’t know her, but knew her maker and he went to the clinic to donate some blood for Vampire Bill. Just when Bridget is about to forgive and forget, Jessica knocks on the door calling for Hoyt. Bridget answers, Jessica apologizes for showing up, says she knows him but he doesn’t know her, and came to tell Hoyt about their past together. Saying they were happy, but she fucked it up, Bridget is standing in the background pissy and complaining – throwing down the ultimatum that if Hoyt walks out to talk to Jessica, they are through. Annnnnd, out the door goes Hoyt! YAY! 

Jessica tells Hoyt that Bill wouldn’t drink the cure, released her as his progeny, and he was the first man that she ever loved. She didn’t know where to go, and he was the only one she wanted to be with, even if it’s selfish. Hoyt says he doesn’t care, and wants to hear the “story of us” and pulls her into his arms. AWWW!! Jessica says she was young and immature, homeschooled sheltered girl that suddenly became a vampire and before she could figure out who she was and what she wanted, she met Hoyt. She goes on to tell him that he saved her life twice – once with Violet, and now, giving her hope. He lets her heal him with her vampy magic blood, and the two seriously reconnect. 

Meanwhile, Jason answers a phone call from Bridget, who asks him to get her. Telling him that the red head showed up and he left, Jason goes out the door and off to Bridge. He pulls up all lights and sirens, and when he gets out of the car, Hoyt belts him in the face! Guess he wasn't fully over that whole "your BFF slept with your girl" thing, huh? He wakes up with Bridget driving his cop car to take him to the hospital. Instead, she convinces him to go back to his place, and he says they’re not having sex tonight. She’s surprised that he would ask, “I just broke up with my boyfriend. Why would you even think I was going to have sex with you?” and he says “trust me, it needed to be said.” Such a stupid stud muffin, that one. 

Back at his place, she’s trying to book a flight back to Alaska, and Jason gets on the phone doin’ his Southern charm thingie with the telephone agent to get her a flight back home. Ever the gentleman, he lets her sleep in his room while he is in the living room, icing first his face, then his balls. LOL! 

Bridget comes out and they start talking about Hoyt. Jason retells Bridget the Hoyt/Jessica/Jason history.  Jason said Hoyt believed it was love at first sight with Jessica, and they were amazing together. Jason tells her how he screwed up by drinking from Jessica, and then sleeping with her, then telling Hoyt all about it. Jason recalls Hoyt saying there was something inside him that was missing and he would never have the kind of relationship that he and Jessica had. Sadly, since Bridge just met Hoyt, she didn't realize met a guy who already met the girl he was supposed to be with. Hoyt and Jessica belong together. Bridget says, “oh come on, I’m going to teach you how not to have sex with someone.” Lying on his bed, they talk and share secrets. 

Sookie isn’t joining in the family dinner at Bellefleurs, and Arlene tells her about the cougar Keith relationship. Sook tells her about infecting Bill with Hep-V. Sookie asks “How do you do it? Keep moving on?” Arlene says it helps when your husband comes in a death vision and tells you to move on, but you just need to do it. Sookie admits that she held back from Alcide because she hadn’t let go of Bill and it was unfair (NO SHIT!), and vows not to do that again. 
Bill answers the door to find Eric, who tells Bill about his experience – wanting to die. Bill says he is doing this for Sookie, and he needs to go so she can love someone else and move on. Eric says that Bill needs to get over himself, and he needs Sookie. It’s her light that pulls them in, just as she is pulled to their darkness.  Bill tells Eric about the black child/void/death dream, and says he cannot give her anything but darkness. Him dying will set her free. 

Eric goes to Sookie and tells him Bill wants to tell her why he’s choosing death. When Sookie says that none of it makes sense, he says it will once Bill explains it to her. He takes her home. 

Eric then goes to Fangtasia, telling Ginger they are finally gonna fuck. She wants it on his throne. She gets all freaky and strattles him, he lets out his fangs, and feds from her. She tells him she has Hep-V, and he says he’s immune. He rips off her panties, and sits there while she rubs against him and makes crazy wild animal calls. His look is priceless! Ginger gets in one good push (maybe two) and falls back saying that was fantastic. This is hilarious! Did he even take off his pants? Whip it out? Me thinks not. 

I’m not sure what was more amusing – her wild screams like a cat in heat followed by the overly dramatic fall backwards, or Eric’s indifferent, bored look throughout it all. 


Damn, how much did that chair go for during the True Blood online auction? 
At Fangtasia, Newme/Sarah is taken out of the basement by Yakuza, and Pam tells her she is “taking her back to blonde.” When she can’t get the foils on her hair, she tells her:
“Listen up twat-lips…” Bwah haa haa!!! Says she needs to not scream when she lets the gag off her mouth. She then goes on…
Pam: “You remind me of Mary”
Sarah/Newme: “Mary Bethany?”
Pam: “OF the whorehouse I use to run. She was much prettier than you ever were. You and her were the same – if you play your cards right, you can be the highest paid trollop in history.”

Mr. Gus asks where Eric was at, while holding Pam under chains. Mr Gus asks if Eric was with his fang-banger Sookie Stackhouse. Does she know about Sara? With each question Eric doesn’t answer, a rope holding a wooden stake is dropped closer to Pam. Eric confesses that Sookie knows about Sara, and Mr. Gus wants to know where she lives. 

Gah. I could live without ever seeing Sookie again, but damn. I’m gonna miss Pam. 

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Dust to Dust, Karina Halle

When a series comes to an end, there’s always a tinge of sadness, yearning that there are going to be more installments. Quite often, there are also unresolved issues, lingering questions, and wanting something in one of the prior books to be referenced or addressed. This was not the case with Karina Halle’s final installment in the Experiment in Terror series, Dust to Dust. 

The 9th novel in the EIT series picks up right where book 8 ends. Halle explained on her blog that book 9 was really the ending of book 8, and I’m glad that she extended the series and made me wait for the final ending. The anticipation was worth it. 

Dust to Dust takes you back to the beginning, so that you can reach the end. Rarely have I seen an author thread prior themes and characters, including haunting imagery and sensations, through one novel without missing a stitch. Everything is in here: from Dex’s family (and their issues), Perry’s family (and their issues), their friends, Maximus and his past life, ghosts and demons from all prior novels, the anguish  that we’ve experienced before with this series, but also the knowledge that we’ve not read anything like this ever. 

This final novel was hell to read. Literally. Saying goodbye to these characters, in finality, was difficult. Halle took the characters to places I did not expect, and it was brilliant!  

No plot summary here. No hints, no spoilers, nothing. You have to read this for yourself.

If you haven’t read the EIT series, you’re seriously missing out! Go, get them now. Hole yourself up in a room, order in, loose some sleep and read the series (including the novellas). 

Thank you, Karina Halle, for providing this series, and Dex and Perry, the ending they all deserved, and the closure we all needed. 

Reading order: 

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

True Blood, Season 7, Ep 8: Almost Home. AKA: She's a fang-banger!

Okay, so crazy Newme/Sarah Newlin is still seeing visions of Jason when the Eric posse shows up and goes to hunt her. She realizes that she must die tonight, and Jason tells her “now you’re letting the truth in” which leads her outside and right into the clutches of Eric. Eric, ready to put an end to Sarah/Newme grabs her by the throat (again) and Pam stops him by pointing a gun to her chest, saying “ you die, I die.

 Eric says her future isn’t very bright and takes a bite out of her, then throws her to the ground. Of course, the bite allows him to get her blood into his system and voila, the Hep-V starts to disappear and our beautiful Eric is back without those crazy black veins.

Oh, and Sarah, AKA Newme, AKA the Messiah, is now calling herself “The Princess of Peace.” She needs to add loopy-loo to her list of names.

Lettie-Mae is still digging up the old house, and the Rev goes to find her and tells the family that currently lives there “please forgive the Reverand’s wife.” Lafayette agrees with Mama-Mae, saying there’s Tara energy somewhere there. 

Lettie-Mae gets right up in the Rev’s face, saying “Sometimes you gotta take a journey, even if it’s a blind one.”
POW! BANG! ZAP! Throwing his own words back at him!!

James shows up and proceeds to feed Lafayette so he can zap back into lala land and get Tara updates. After Faye, Mama Mae feeds, and then so does the Rev! He sees the vision of Tara, and I’ll be damned! He’s a believer! Monkeys anyone? Oh come on, sing it with me: 
"Then I saw her face, now I'm a believer!"

In their Tara-dream-state, she leads him into the house, where they see a scene from her childhood with Tara, Sookie, Faye, and Mama Mae. Tara’s Papa comes in and freaks everyone out. He works hard for his money, and doesn’t appreciate Mama spending it on silly things like a birthday party with gifts for Tara. He ransacks the house looking for his gun, while Mama sends Tara and the other kids out of the house. Tara runs to her bedroom, find the gun hiding in a drawer, and as her dad is holding a knife over her mom, she raises the gun and instead of shooting, hides the gun in the yard. That’s what is buried there. Papa runs out, leaving them, and Mama falls in despair. Thus begins her trek into mental illness, me thinks. 

Back to the present, Rev unearths the gun and Tara says “I’m sorry I didn’t pull that trigger.” Mama confesses to not taking care of her daughter, and they both admit bad stuff happened to them. Tara asks her mother to forgive herself and let her go. How? Tara says, “You need to go on living” and makes mom her promise. At that promise, Tara embraces her mama, then crosses into the fade. Goodbye sweet Tara. Finally, the departure you deserve. 

Jason is being fawned over by Hoyt’s girlfriend, and the two of them are looking at old photos of Hoyt. She blurts out “may our children have our nose”. Hoyt stops, um, What? Children? Who said anything about children?  While he and his woman are bickering over children/no children, Jason gets a pic-text from Violet of Adilyn and Jessica tied up, along with an address. Jason has to go, and Bridget goes along with Jason, saying she’s not spending more time with Hoyt. She’s upset at his no-children policy. 

Jason walks into Violet’s lair, is overtaken by him, and strapped to some crazy contraption that will rip him limb from limp. HOLY CRAPBALLS! Violet is sick and twisted. She threatened to take off Wade’s digits, and rip off Adilyn’s perky hooters. But, she saved the super sick and twisted for her pal Jessica. In order to make Jessica feel the paint that she felt when she saw Jason inside her, she’s ready to poke her with a flaming red-hot poker. Literally, a poker. Okay, a dildo (that’s the same thing as a poker, right?). Luckily she goes off on a rant, stating 

“All I ever wanted from you Jason was to live in the world with no wit. No intellect. A world where you worship me for the perfect creature that I am!

While she’s talking about her dummy worship, Hoyt come in guns-a-blazin’ and shoots her. Jessica is finally let out of her chains, and Adilyn runs to Wade. 

Jessica asks “Where did he come from”, then remembers she mind-melded him and he doesn’t know who she is. She’s sad to see him embraced by his woman. Holly and Andy run in and find their kids, and the family shares a tender moment. 

Hoyt is thanked by Andy, and Jason shakes his hand, while Jessica looks on. She says hi to Hoyt, and tries to express her thanks. He’s just glad he was able to get there when he did. She introduces herself to him, and the both smile. Aww. Memories. 

Bridget sits with Jason and he’s not okay. Not missing the looks Hoyt and Jessica gave each other, she wants to know more about her. She asks Jason if Jessica is his girlfriend, and he says he doesn’t know what to call her. Jason drives Jessica home, and they have a chat in the car. Jason says he needs to stop making bad decisions, and Jessica says “um speaking of bad decisions”. She never felt betrayed by him, but he says that’s because she never took him seriously to begin with. Their paths have crossed at inappropriate times. Hoyt reminded them of how uncomplicated they are. They agree they have a beautiful friendship.  

Jason shows later at the Bellefleurs and is talking to Arlene when Hoyt walks in. Hoyt asks about the redhead from last night. While he cares for Bridget, it’s just something about Jessica that he can’t shake. After learning that Jessica is staying at Vampire Bill’s, and how upset she is over his disease, Hoyt goes to her. She lets him in, and he hands her a pint of his own blood, saying he’s been tested and his blood is clean. She can give it to Bill to help him. Awwww. Isn’t he the sweetest?

Quiet Sookie is a thinking Sookie. She tells Bill that she doesn’t want to drudge up the past, but wants to know about Sophie Ann. Bill states that Sophie Ann wanted to take up all the faeries, all the fangs, and bring them to her and close up the portal, then breed them. When Sookie asks Bill why he didn’t deliver her to Sophie Ann, he tells her that he actually felt human again when he saw her. Aww. Then says “You all want what we can’t have. Deny it long enough and you lose your way.” Such darkness inside Bill. 

Mr. Gus, Eric, Pam, and others are talking and Mr. Gus tells them they can’t perfect the HepV / NewmeBlood but they have to keep having the infected keep buying it. Pam and Eric are fine with this, but Mr. Gus also states that no one can know that Sarah/Newme is the cure as that would totally ruin his money making plan. 

Bill and Sookie are in bed when Eric knocks on the door. He tells Sookie
“I came looking for you because I wanted to let you know I was going to be okay”

She asks where is his HepV infected veins, and is he healed? He says yes, and he can’t say how, but he is cured. She tells him that Bill is sick, and he needs the cure. Whatever worked on him must work on Eric! She tells him Bill is dying and accelerating at a crazy rate because he contracted HepV from her.  He stalls, saying he’ll come back the next night as dawn is coming. She doesn’t think Bill will last that long, and she runs out after Eric, just as Jason pulls up dropping off Jessica. 

Sookie goes looking for Eric at Fangtasia, while the Mr Gus Yakuza Goons tell her she’s brave, but stupid. One of the goons tells Mr. Gus, who wants to meet this Sookie Stackhouse. She wants just a minute with Eric, and Mr. Gus asks how they know each other. Eric says she’s a fang-banger, and after fucking her once, she keeps coming back and he can’t get rid of her. Ouch. Mr. Gus calls Eric a very lucky man, and wonders why Eric is protecting her. Eric says it’s just that her brother is a sheriff, and he’ll look for Sook if she goes missing. Eric says he will glammer her, and she can read Mr. Gus’ thoughts and knows that something is in the basement. Eric tells her, go away, you never saw me, and she pretends to be under his spell, repeats it and walks away. But we all know the truth. 

Sookie pretends to go away, but hits the basement of Fantasia and finds Sarah and has a wtf moment. Sarah tries to get Sookie to help her escape, and Sookie figures out that she’s the cure. 

“Even as the cure, you’re still the fucking problem.” Awesome!

Sookie runs back to Jessica and Bill, tells them there is a cure, and takes them both back to the Fangtasia basement. After telling Bill that he needs to feed from Sarah, he respectfully declines. WHAT WHAT WHAT??!!! He doesn’t want it.  
UGGGHH!!! Really Bill? You're checking out? Done? Terminado? Finito? Fini??

We shall have to wait and see. Only two more to go. 

Final thoughts: Am I the only one disturbed that Sookie slutty Stackhouse left Bill's bed, jumped in Alcide's truck, and went to Eric? Okay, I understand these three are the holy trinity of hotness, but really? That just bugged me. She bugs me. I might be glad there are only two more episodes left with her in them. Ever. 

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Lead, by Kylie Scott (Stage Dive Series, #3)

Oh Jimmy. You’re such a broody, alcoholic, emotional train wreck of a mess! Of course, that means I loved reading his story! 

Jimmy, the lead singer of Stage Dive is featured in this third installment of the series. If you’ve been reading the series, you know he’s an arrogant, narcissistic, a-hole. You know he’s carrying around some major oversized chips on his shoulders, and some heavy baggage. Now you know what and why. 
Jimmy is fresh out of rehab for his multiple addictions, has burned through several “addiction coaches”/assistants and is in need of another one to help keep him in line, and out of the bottom of a bottle.
Lena is a tough talking, snarky, bad-ass girl. She gives attitude to her boss, the bands manager, who promptly fires her. After seeing what she can dish out to him, Mal and the gang know they’ve found the one that just may keep Jimmy in line.
“I might have been asked to moderate my attitude a time of two. But really, life was too short to take shit”
Can I put that on a t-shirt? Bumper sticker? Magnet?  Anyhoo, back to Lena.
She decides to take that job, and ends up moving in with Jimmy to keep an eye on him. While she’s no doubt attracted to him, she tries to convince herself that she wants no part of him, or a relationship. She’s been burned by men – in her words has dated “a cheater, a thief, a repressed homosexual, a foot fetishist, and various men to just wanted a chance to meet my sister.” She’s not in the mood for another, especially one with Jimmy’s past.
Doesn’t work. As he breaks down over the death of Mal’s mother and seeks comfort in her, she realizes that there is more to Jimmy than just his good looks and sarcasm.
“With him in the room, I apparently had the concentration span of a four-year-old loaded up on sugar.”
He’s moody, barely pays attention to her, and when he does, often barks orders at her and complains. She knows that her attraction is one-sided. When she acknowledges she has feelings for him decides to quit her job to save herself, he is furious! Pushing her to reveal the real reason she is leaving, she confesses that she has feelings for him and he laughs at her! Asshole. 

After a really bad attempt at apologizing, he reads her magazine with the “Guide to getting over him” article, and decides the article has some merit. He enlists himself to help her follow the list of recommendations, including dating other people, finding new hobbies, get fit, and a whole host of other things. He commences to help her the next morning by getting her out of bed at sunrise and making her go jogging with him, setting her up on dates, and even includes some of the girl-pampering suggested by the article.
When dating other people doesn’t solve anything but make them both miserable, Jimmy comes up with a new solution – sleep with each other to get her feelings for him out of her system, and allow him to release some pent up sexual frustration. What ensues is the development of their non-relationship. She knows her feelings are getting deeper and she's about to be crushed. He continues to deny, deny, deny.
What I loved about this book is the same as the others – the characters are flawed, but real. They’re redeemable. They are hilarious. They’re friends, they fight, they argue, they laugh, and they stick together. The main characters don’t just wake up, see each other and BAM fall in love.  
 The characters from the series are involved in each book and you get to continue to read about favorites from the first two books,Lick, and Play in this one. The final book in the series, Deep, comes out in January and frankly, it’s too long of a wait for me! I want this book NOW!
In the meantime, I’m going to pick up her other series and read those to hold me over.
Kylie Scott – I may be in love with you. In a crazed fan-girl, non-real-life-stalker kind of way.  Just sayin’
I can't wait to see more of the gang, including  my favorite, Mal.
He delivers one of my favorite lines as he's talking to his "son":
"If she means something to you, you gotta do the woo, son. You can’t just be trying to stick it in.” 
Love Mal. Just kills me! 

Get the series on Amazon, Barnes and Noble and other retailers.