22 best lines from 22 Jump Street!

As usual, I waited a few weeks after the film came out to go see it. I knew it would be good. 

What I realize is that I get jokes that people don’t. Maybe I’m a pop-culture junkie and I get these obscure references. Maybe I’ve seen too much television and read too much crap. Maybe I’m just old. Either way, I found myself laughing way too hard at the one-liners and hidden messages in the film while others just missed out. I’m cracking up. Everyone else…crickets. Strange. Whatever. This is one that will be part of my permanent collection and can’t wait until it’s released for home viewing. 

If you haven’t seen this movie, you are missing out. Please be sure you’ve seen the first film, 21 Jump Street, as you don’t want to miss some of the jokes from 21 to 22. Then, watch and laugh. If you’ve already seen the film, go again and laugh your ass off at these best lines and scenes from the film.  

1. Look at the captain’s new office. It’s like a giant cube of ice.”
2. “He like the Mexican Wolverine!”
3. “Oh, Hey look! It’s the Korean Jesus!”
   “It’s the Vietnamese Jesus now you racist motherfucker!”
   Best part: it’s Dustin Nguyen!
4. “He has one class in Human Sexuality and now he’s Harvey Milk.”
5. “Fuck you Arnold Schwarzenegger!”
   “See you Terminator.”
6. “Don’t Mr. and Mrs. Smith me!”
7. “Where are you from originally?”
   “Oh me? I’m straight outta Compton!”
8. "Tokyo Drift!”
9. “Maybe we could join the secret service and protect the president”
   “Nah, that’s no good.”
   “What? I thought it was good.” (White House Down reference)
10. “Dude.” “Dude.” “ Bro.”  “Bro.” “Dude.” “Bro.”
11. “Meat Cute.” HAHA. Meet cute…get it? If you don’t, I won’t explain it.
12. “I thought we had Cate Blanchett with the budget.”
13. “Something cool!”
14. “Dude. You high fived him for fucking your daughter!”
15. Stoned Dude in the corner during Schmidt and Mercedes fight scene. 
16. “Ass-and-Titties” Channing Tatum dance.
17. Benjamin Hill Center for Film Studies on the building during crazy car chase!
18. Annie Hall lobster reference.
19. Jonah Hill’s walk of shame!
20. Metropolitan City State College. Mascot: The MC State Statesmen. 
21. Cameo from Johnny Depp’s replacement in the original show: Richard Grieco as security guard Booker. He didn’t age well.
22. My personal favorite: “I have tenure. I can say whatever I want and they can’t fire me!”
    I think I was the only one laughing at that one…

 

And just because this is pure awesomeness: